I'm Not Writing About You - Am I?

Often people tell me that they read my articles and wonder how I know what they are going through. They think that perhaps someone has told me about their situation or that I have some kind of magical powers that gave me insight into their troubles.

Well, you can relax. I have been writing articles for this column for almost twelve years and have never based any article on one person. In fact, most of them were written without me having any particular person in mind.

After having seen over 7,000 clients, though I have found that there are some recurring themes in human nature.

1. Communication - It doesn't matter whether you are a person who writes thousands of pages of policies a year or contacts others with abbreviated words in 140-character text messages - communicating effectively is difficult. Each of us has different values and assigns meanings based on our experiences. What means one thing to one person can mean a totally different thing to another person.
2. Relationships - Your relationship with others and with yourself can be wonderful or horrible. Sometimes we don't have the skills to deal with others and can be abused or neglected without knowing how to resolve the issues that haunt us. You might have problems starting, maintaining, enhancing or ending relationships.
3. Parenting - Anyone with more than one child understands just how different personalities can reside in the same environment. It takes more than love to raise children. You need skills, patience, resources and support!
4. Money - Some have too much, and others don't have any. Some people hold onto it while others can't spend it quickly enough. They say that money makes the world go round but sometimes it stops people in their tracks!
5. Sex - Too much, too little, in the wrong place, with the wrong person or can't. Sex is always an interesting activity to ponder. And it certainly isn't what everyone expects or hopes for.
6. Responsibilities - Perhaps you can manage a large company with ease but have arguments at home about who is going to take out the garbage. The concepts of can or can't, will or won't are what determine how things get done in the world.
7. Personal Issues - I can see five people who have exactly the same thing happen to them and each will have a different reaction. One might get drunk or high. A second attempts suicide. The third might run away or move while a fourth turns to another person for support. The fifth didn't even notice that something important happened. People are interesting.

So, the next time that you read one of my articles and think that it is about you - perhaps it is! You see, I write about the complex and interesting situations that humans find themselves in.

And that's what also keeps me working as a Registered Psychologist. You see I just love helping people to navigate their lives and problem-solve!